Tuesday, January 11, 2011

the smiles of gods

3.18.10
In the royalty of the trees there are no consequences

Tuning in shades of grey
Touching my walls watching me from behind
Quartered lines
Caught in lies
Referring to your Everyday

3.19.10
Through the legs of time a breeze passes in my window
Thinking of her, feeling knowing her, I can only discern Pepe is here
Or is it just in my mind?
Spring is tomorrow happening

Love in a Rush

Screaming conversations
Turning the bed off
Closing your little waiting eyes
Traveling on strangers of yourself
Of the dark
Imaginary pieces floating in the dark
Peeing on yourself in fright
Losing your winnings
Tight to the guess
Yesterday’s afraid animals
Picking up their bodies, their graves and certainties, hours and graces,
Proofing and times of fear
Losing and loving like any other
Doodoodoodling into yourself
Loves lost imaginary miracles
Inside and outside of hotels
Awakened by your Ignorance, the shadows on your eyes
Your hummingbird indifferences 
Hybridize yourself
To become as polyself, lifting in your vehicles
Humming as the birds in tightened comas of night
Remembering themselves in bells
Painted guns
And long lashes
Lefty said he’d clean it
So we can Leave
Leave
Isn’t that what we were born to do?
Frying feelings
And caged beings
Longing to lodge
Into eternity
Entrecotes interdite
In lashes of forever
Lashes to make you cry
Lashes to hold your eye
Keep your lid in your memory
Powdered dried emotions
Sunlit forgivings
 of drownings
and then I died in my thinkings
the beautiful belongings of nothings
the lights the lights the uppings of lights
I had thought this is it.  I’ve grown into me I’ve grown into what they didn’t want me to know
I forgot myself
And left myself for a night
Hiding in the meat like shit and excuses
Blue damians and kudes and lites
Titepoule wanders in body’s birth
Wondering and wandering in the movie of life
First woman pharaoh of Egypt
Only woman pharaoh ever
My bluest truth in golds and yous
Yu and you and yu and yu
Holding my misgivings in secrets of smells
Heats in knives and hooks
Eyes gone wild
I think I can forgive myself of my doubts on Pepe’s death





Dancing fires convivial and contagious
Dare to take the earth
Big and small superegos
Rippling, blaming, showing the waste
Because you say it shows
It shows
And you live in its caves its longings
Deviating from truth- the connection-
An animal wanting to leave the fight

If at this point you didn’t get it,
You never will
There’ll be your past
And that’s about it
Gone
And gone
In backpacks of forever
You’ve lost your finesse
Your volume
Everything you wanted in a wine
Is what you wanted in another
I was thinking-
You.  I’ve lost you.
And I know that is ok
Because you
I have you
Even though I’ll probably never have you
Again

Ok.  That’s ok.  She’s just being nice. 
I understand and that’s fine
A fine mistake

People FAIL
People fail at being linear
At telling the truth or seeing it
Itching to tell their own, quiet in non-recognition
To the grave to the grave to the grave
Sunken silent holes for the ones we’ve adored
Sunken in the Earth we all could ignore

I’m in love with your hard face Elliott
In love with your truth and bone
And I wouldn’t have thought of it
Until someone mentioned it
Truth and bone
I imagined a softer place to land
And I landed in middle hard America
If I ever knew your loss
Pretty face it was my loss
Scarred in the cheeks
In your moves
Looking in your scripts your squiggles your aire
In the space in front
Where no one else goes
Not admittedly goes
Meeting your back
And the smiles of gods
Treating your being
Waiting for your place
Little crystals in drying rain
Knowing the paths of the breeze
Into disappearance,
Crossing place
Forgetting the rules, charming your way

French kisses forgetting the rules
You’re the only one who can paint you
You’re the only one who can finish you







Just the greasy mouths
The reckless flowers of my heart
Keeping me in their snares

The devil doesn’t smile
He doesn’t rest

Just the greasy mouths
Eating wolves or eating wolves
Reminding you to

Be the preserver but not the preserved 




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