Wednesday, April 20, 2011

tucked

The white blossoms now, remind me of last year's blow of flowers.  

April 10, 2010

I miss her most in the glow of morning
Her warmth now somewhere else
I could kiss her until my lips fell off
But they have nowhere to fall
Her beauty becomes the air
Her air becomes my breath
And I breathe in her absence
Until I also become absent
Until I also drive love to my grave
To keep myself warm in my death
My love will settle over my skin
Until my skin is gone
And my love will settle the dirt
As a hush, a caress, a fertile glow
In the mornings that I am gone

Pepe, my heart has water in it
Heavy from my heat
I find it interesting to stay calm
And to look at the soft lines
To look at the blur and fuzz
Of newborn leaves
Perspiring their blossoms to the street
Some flew through my window
New confetti turns to old confetti
Instantly
And the welcomed gift of life through my window
Caught my attention in its streaming hands
Snowing empty faces past my sill
To softer places than the street
But they don’t belong where they won’t disintegrate
They don’t belong to me
And now I’m in charge of these friendly faces
That are dying on colored wool
Running their last white lives
On my natural floor
Oh the faces, I don’t know if they are turned up
Or turned down
They won’t look at me
The shy petals of 58th Street

Pepe, sometimes you wouldn’t look at me either
Your tiny little head so attached
Laying in your turkey position, tucked
Little black wrists so limp
You’d keep it all to yourself
Contained in your cuteness
Pushed behind your nugget nose
Sparking your spine in gentle black
Motionless
You moved me
And I’d sway as the branches next door
Lit up in the explosion of spirits
Laughing in the silence of love
Doubling over in a crowded heart
Exalted in the freedom of you
Still
Motionless
Cutie pie
You’d make me jump
Much higher than your poking hairs
Higher than those few oily ones
On your spine, poking
God, they’d poke me in a comfort I can’t explain
They pet me like the tree across pet me
And it was always a surprise
I still see you Chou Chou
But I don’t have enough of you for the rest of my life
Little girl, what do I do?
Look at me then.  Keep looking at me
From your invisibility
Maybe now you will look at me

You are my shy petal
And I won’t dismiss the littlest gifts
Little fits
Of joy
Returning static to the whispering sun
A lift a release I am you we are one

Chou Chou?
Are you looking at me?
Then I will place you in me
It’s the only thing I can think to do
I am going to tuck you in to my fluttering soul
You in your turkey position, tucked
It’s easy that way
And I will hold you dear
Maybe love myself more if you are in me
I will I do I now cradle you
In my name

They’ll read about us in the papers, Pep
Cat Found Inside Woman
We’ll be famous for a little while
I hope you can handle that
We’ll be known for a little while
Until they forget about us
But I promise you I will never forget you
It would be like forgetting myself
Little girl, we are one





E. Kelly's Spiritual Journey on Live courageously:

"Our anxieties and fears come from our own refusal to live what we really believe in the depths of our soul.  Fears are an inner nonalignment."

3 comments:

  1. Fear of just being me has ruled my life. Part of finding the passion, courage, energy and drive to launch a new website, with my first Blog linked in it even, came from your Deep Fried Desires Blog. Thank you so very much. It's just thrown together just now but I had to get it going and out there. Bliss...best wishes...and Thank You. the site =
    krallosvierd.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. ah, that's
    www.krallosvierd.com
    It's a name from a dream related to what I saw in that dream

    ReplyDelete

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